I Love ME…
My mom’s story continues to inspire me. I feel a sense of responsibility to share it. I believe her story is, in a way, everyone’s story. It’s one that can create change in others. Myself included. It was a huge A-HA moment, because…
As the tears flowed into her Lobster Roll, the same was happening to me. I saw myself in her. Her insecurities were my insecurities. Up to that point neither one of us even realized it but, with no intention on her part, I was indirectly conditioned to feel like her:
Not being “enough”:
Not pretty enough. Not loved enough or worthy enough. Not deserving enough. Not smart enough or good enough. Not educated enough. Not athletic enough or thin enough. Not funny enough.
Fear:
Fear of failing. Fear of success. Fear of being judged by friends, family, and strangers. Fear of walking down a long, dark hallway with doors. Fear of snakes. Fear of being seen.
Anger:
Anger with someone I haven’t seen in years and never expect to see again. Anger about a past relationship. Anger at someone I didn’t even know, who cut me off last week on the highway. Anger at myself. Anger at being treated unfairly.
Guilt:
Guilt for doing something that was unfair. Guilt for making poor decisions in the past. Guilt for “not being enough”…
I remember looking at my mom and saying, “this way of thinking must end. NOW!”
My niece, who was in her late teens at the time, was sitting to the right of me witnessing this moment. We all agreed. We would never want her - or anyone else we loved and cared about - to feel “not enough.” We would never want them to fear the future or hold onto fears from the past.
Then, it was time to turn a question back to my mom:
“Is it okay with you if I feel not pretty enough? If I feel I’m not lovable enough or worthy enough to be happy and satisfied with myself?”
To stir the pot some more, I told her:
“If you don’t love yourself, you can’t fully and wholeheartedly love me. As I, am a part of you.”
Well, boy! Did that statement make her think!?
I share this part of the story for mothers. There are many mothers who can learn from this.
The types of thoughts, stories, and perceptions that you hold onto affect the future. Negative ones limit your ability to create happiness and satisfaction in life. But it doesn’t just negatively affect you. It has a ripple effect. It will negatively impact your kids. And their kids. And on, and on…
What if you could let go of the false perceptions, the negative stories, beliefs, and thoughts in your mind? What if you could take the garbage out and make room for peace, positivity, and contentment in yourself and for others? What would your life look like?
BTW: I did buy the “I love ME” shirt in Maine and I make a point to wear it to my moms, at birthday celebrations and random family get-togethers. It makes for a great laugh and a reminder: It is absolutely acceptable to love yourself. To live a happy and satisfying life, it’s vital to love yourself and increase your self-worth… I’m here to teach you why and how!
